Alas, my new car doesn’t have a cd player. They are being phased out by auto makers, and cds will soon will soon go the way of cassettes and become a novelty of the past. Change always comes, and we must, although at times grudgingly, adapt.
Tired of not being able to listen to my audio cds in the car, for they inspire me and keep my focus on higher things, I recently spent one evening downloading several of my cds onto the computer. After creating a playlist, I was ready to add it to my device, a flash drive Up in the right hand corner of the computer screen was the word “sync.” Only after pressing sync could the material be transmitted to the device for my listening pleasure when plugged into my car.
While I was doing this, I thought of the spiritual metaphor in the process. A pool of true wisdom and higher knowledge lies within us. Yet we have such constant outer distraction and inner mind chatter that we are seldom in touch with it. We are divided into parts, and have forgotten how to find that sense of wholeness that we long for. We seek yet another distraction, another mind toy. Still we remain unfulfilled.
Dreams are great teachers. In a recent dream, I was viewing a man and woman who were having discord in their relationship. As she was resting, he knelt over her and said, “You talk so much that you can’t hear that I love you.” While I know this can be true in our relationships with others, it can also be true of our relationship with our higher self.
We can think of this break in communication caused by constant mental talk as a break in communication between Soul and the human consciousness, but also between us and what we conceive God, source, or inner guidance to be. After the dream, I had to ask myself, “Am I talking to myself so much inwardly that I can’t hear that You love me, or sense Your presence at times?”
This morning I heard a jazz musician on a tv program speak of Miles Davis. He said that while Miles wasn’t technically perfect, he had the gift of creating pause, space between notes, that give a special gift and sense of stillness to his music. I again saw a wonderful metaphor in this, for art always teaches us about life. We must give pause to sense what lies between. Do we use our time, or does our time use us? Do we use our life, or does life use us?
One of the talks in my cd collection is entitled “The Heart and Hand of God,” by Harold Klemp. That title has always given me much to contemplate. How do the heart and hand of God move through life? Can I be the heart and hand of God in my own life?
Those who have a daily time of quiet contemplation, prayer, or meditation, or who spend time in a quiet walk or in nature, know that this special time is when we hit pause. We take time to come into inner and outer harmony, in “sync” with what lies between.
I have learned that this daily time of true contemplation allows me to come into harmony with what is true and real and align with a greater purpose. We must first gain this gift for ourselves before we can, in service, give this gift back to life. I can only be the hand of God, in service to life, if my heart has opened to a greater love and harmony. I can only bring peace if I have peace. I can only be a source of love if love has entered my own heart without compromise.
To synchronize, to come into harmony with, is to come into agreement with something. How often do we take time to consider what we are agreeing to let into our consciousness? Our agreements with life determine how we view ourself and others. We have false standards by which we judge ourself and others. Most of our inner agreements are unconscious, imbedded over time by family patterns, media, society, and even politics, education and religion. These agreements can only be removed by becoming aware of them and replacing them with a higher agreement. If we can train our mind, our consciousness to be flexible and fluid, to be open to change, we have learned a valuable secret of survival.
A daily spiritual practice helps us come into agreement with that still quiet voice, the spiritual current of inner Light and Sound. In time old messages and agreements are replaced by higher ones. What do you want yours to be?
“I Won’t Give Up On Loving You”
A little over a year and a half ago, I adopted a three month old black and white kitten, a beautiful little boy. Driving home with him, I wondered what to name him. At that moment, a beautiful brand new Maxima automobile drove past us. I knew that his name was to be Max, and that surely the white car was a sign that he was a spiritual blessing. He is, but not in the way I imagined at the time.
It wasn’t long before the tests began. I soon realized I had brought home a very energetic, destructive, willful animal. My older female cat hated him, and screamed whenever he came near her. I promised the rescue agency I wouldn’t declaw him, and he presently began to shred a leather chair, an upholstered one, a leather bench and drapes. It wasn’t long until his curiosity had him poking at a mirror in the middle of the night which caused it to fall and crash though the glass top table below it, breaking the mirror, table top, and lamp. The loud noise frightened him, but not enough to prevent his breaking a standing lamp a few weeks later, then a tall red vase.
He also loves to jump onto the stove top, kitchen counters, and to open cabinets and climb inside. Nothing breaks, but not very sanitary. Every morning I began the day stressed and unhappy, and felt I must call the rescue group and return him. But I told my friends, “If I give him up, someone else is sure to kill him!”
Max also loves time in the litter box. All former cats have done their business, neatly covered it, and gracefully stepped out. Not Max. He digs and digs like a child in a sand box, throwing litter every where, about two to three cups with each use, then proceeds to track it over the rest of the house. I constantly sweep and clean. I never know what I will find when I come home from work in the evening. Yet, I just couldn’t bring myself to call and plead for him to be removed from my home. I knew I had this contract with him, and I was determined to find a way to see it through.
A few months ago, I had reached my limit. Something was going to change, or he would have to go. I picked him up, held him in a tight embrace close to me. He looked up with that beautiful face, and I firmly said to him, “I will not give up on loving you.” I began to understand that I was the one who would have to change and accept him, love him, and give up the reaction to his behaviors.
After that I began to gently correct him, removing him from counters, etc., and gently scolding and removing him from my other cat, Bella, when he aggressively approached her. I enticed him with toys, balls, and treats. His behavior is gradually changing. He is still an energetic, willful animal. But I have grown to love and admire his uniqueness, and I am more patient with him. Now when he jumps in my lap at the end of the day and snuggles, readying himself to take a nap, and he looks up at me, I say with all sincerity, “I love you. I love you.”
Max brought a lesson I already knew, but was tested on: it is always love that brings any true change and healing.
This experience with Max reminded me that we humans, as we grow and move through our life experience, also consciously or unconsciously do harm to our self and others. And there is usually someone quietly in the background, silently saying, “I won’t give up on loving you.” Maybe that person is a parent, a close friend, someone who knows and loves the true and real part of our self. It is also that Divine presence, spiritual guide, guardian angel, or however you might think of the eternal first cause that created us. It doesn’t give up on loving us until we awaken enough to know that we are loved, no matter what. That presence silently whispers to us, “You are made of stardust, and music and light and love. I will never give up on loving you.” When we finally hear that inner voice, that eternal message, we then have learned the purpose and gift of life: To learn to receive this love and give it back to life. To never give up on loving, even when it’s hard.
After hearing the famous and much-loved song, “I Did It My Way” last evening on TV, it has been playing in my mind. This morning I had some thoughts about doing it “my way” versus the “high way.”
Perhaps the composer of the song was referring to staying true to oneself, one’s integrity, and surviving obstacles and challenges. Reflecting on the song, however, had me reflecting on the past years in my life when I did things “my way,” meaning from the unconscious, unaware state of the human ego.
From my limited viewpoint framed by limited life experiences, doing things my way didn’t necessarily turn out to be the best way. Time and experience teach us better. These days I begin my day by asking in my morning contemplation that my thoughts, words, and actions be aligned with my higher self, Soul, and that all be done according to Thy will, for my highest good and the good of the whole.
And from The Lord’s Prayer, so often recited in this country: “…Thy will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.”
True alignment with will larger than our personal ego requires careful thought and reflection, humility, and an open heart and open mind. Maybe there is so much discord, war, unhappiness in the world because everyone is doing it their way, not looking inwardly for the High Way.
I’m still looking, wondering, learning, walking the road of life more carefully than years ago, but still learning where the cracks and potholes are. But I have found that I don’t see them by looking down, only when I look up.
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